"I'm about to burst with song; I can't keep quiet about you! God, my God, I can't thank you enough." -ps. 30:12, tmsg
Christ has been showing off to me recently. He's been taking me on a romantic adventure through the sunny streets of Sydney and waking me up every morning with the sweetest of songs. Every time I meet with him, he's more wonderful than ever before. I am in love with his presence and enchanted by the words he softly speaks in my ear. I can't get him out of my mind!
Before I explain the blessings the Lord has lavished upon me lately, there's something you've got to know about me. I've been carrying a heavy burden lately. My heart has been permeated with the stench of bitterness and crippled by the repulsive presence of insecurity. I have been angry, confused, sad, weary, self-righteous, entitled, judgmental, and overall selfish. All the while, I was unhappy that these things were defining me, but the crazy thing is, I didn't know who I was without them. So once God started removing these ugly flaws one by one, I didn't know who the person left behind was. I was lost, unsure of what I stood for or what my purpose in life was. I was unsure of who I was. But there was one thing I did know: that when I didn't understand, I would always choose God.
This was a commitment I made for myself a few months ago. So many things in life don't make sense and it's a rare event to get clear answers. I accepted this, knowing I would not understand things for a while, but I was confident that the Lord would pull through. All I have to do is trust and continually choose to love him.
And love him I do!
My journey here to Australia has been one of the best decisions I have ever made. I am opened up to a foreign world that has new ideas about life and different systems of thinking. The people here have taught me what it looks like to apply theology to real life. No longer is reconciliation a subject that I study with books or forgiveness a doctrine I research. They are real life concepts that have incredible consequences when applied with a genuine and humble heart. The Body of Christ is no longer a pretty term I use when looking for a synonym for the word "church" while writing papers. Instead, it is a real community of believers, comprised of the faces of the beautiful brothers and sisters I have met along the way. Jesus is no longer just the name of someone I read about in books. It is the name that is always on my lips, the name of the Lover of my Soul.
My soul has been so empowered by the Spirit lately. I thought I would never be able to let go of my anger, yet it is melting away before my eyes. If you told me a few months ago that I wouldn't be bitter against those who have betrayed me, but instead be speaking about them kindly and praying for their joy, I would have laughed in your face. Yet that is exactly what is happening. I didn't think I'd be able to be confident in myself after all the things that have torn me down, yet a confidence that comes from Christ alone is seeping out of me and overflowing into my actions. The Spirit of the Living God is empowering me every moment and it is glorious.
And while I am being empowered, I am falling deep, deeply in love with my Savior. I am swept away by his romance. I am speechless on account of his goodness. I am filled with a warm joy at the thought of spending an eternity with him. I am happy to the point of insanity when I think about the fact that he is not done chasing me.
Jesus has been changing things lately. So much good has come out of the last couple of chaotic, messy months. He's brought me a long way from where I was and shown me how to look at things from a heavenly perspective. Like Elisha's servant, my eyes have been opened to see that those who are with me are greater than those who are against me.
Jesus has been so abundantly good to me, and it ain't over yet.
Before I explain the blessings the Lord has lavished upon me lately, there's something you've got to know about me. I've been carrying a heavy burden lately. My heart has been permeated with the stench of bitterness and crippled by the repulsive presence of insecurity. I have been angry, confused, sad, weary, self-righteous, entitled, judgmental, and overall selfish. All the while, I was unhappy that these things were defining me, but the crazy thing is, I didn't know who I was without them. So once God started removing these ugly flaws one by one, I didn't know who the person left behind was. I was lost, unsure of what I stood for or what my purpose in life was. I was unsure of who I was. But there was one thing I did know: that when I didn't understand, I would always choose God.
This was a commitment I made for myself a few months ago. So many things in life don't make sense and it's a rare event to get clear answers. I accepted this, knowing I would not understand things for a while, but I was confident that the Lord would pull through. All I have to do is trust and continually choose to love him.
And love him I do!
My journey here to Australia has been one of the best decisions I have ever made. I am opened up to a foreign world that has new ideas about life and different systems of thinking. The people here have taught me what it looks like to apply theology to real life. No longer is reconciliation a subject that I study with books or forgiveness a doctrine I research. They are real life concepts that have incredible consequences when applied with a genuine and humble heart. The Body of Christ is no longer a pretty term I use when looking for a synonym for the word "church" while writing papers. Instead, it is a real community of believers, comprised of the faces of the beautiful brothers and sisters I have met along the way. Jesus is no longer just the name of someone I read about in books. It is the name that is always on my lips, the name of the Lover of my Soul.
My soul has been so empowered by the Spirit lately. I thought I would never be able to let go of my anger, yet it is melting away before my eyes. If you told me a few months ago that I wouldn't be bitter against those who have betrayed me, but instead be speaking about them kindly and praying for their joy, I would have laughed in your face. Yet that is exactly what is happening. I didn't think I'd be able to be confident in myself after all the things that have torn me down, yet a confidence that comes from Christ alone is seeping out of me and overflowing into my actions. The Spirit of the Living God is empowering me every moment and it is glorious.
And while I am being empowered, I am falling deep, deeply in love with my Savior. I am swept away by his romance. I am speechless on account of his goodness. I am filled with a warm joy at the thought of spending an eternity with him. I am happy to the point of insanity when I think about the fact that he is not done chasing me.
Jesus has been changing things lately. So much good has come out of the last couple of chaotic, messy months. He's brought me a long way from where I was and shown me how to look at things from a heavenly perspective. Like Elisha's servant, my eyes have been opened to see that those who are with me are greater than those who are against me.
Jesus has been so abundantly good to me, and it ain't over yet.
there's something good about your heart, he chose you just the way you are.
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